Doofus Of The Day #1,050

Today’s award goes to basketball player D. J. Cooper, an American competing in Europe. Cooper had to undergo a doping control to potentially join the Bosnian national team as a naturalized player. The test results on the urine that Cooper provided as his own, revealed that he’s… pregnant. More precisely, the presence of “gHC”, a hormone the placenta produces after impregnation, was detected in the urine sample. FIBA immediately suspended the player for fraud. Cooper’s punishment will keep him out of courts until June 20, 2020. There’s more at the link. It seems Mr. Cooper “borrowed” his girlfriend’s urine for the sample

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Doofus Of The Day #1,049

Today’s award goes to a particularly dense Canadian politician wannabe.  A tip o’ the hat to Small Dead Animals for finding her tweet. Take a closer look at the last photograph. Click the image below for a larger view. She’s wearing high heeled boots on slippery rocks, and there’s no fishing line on either the reel or the rod!  Can you say “political poser”?  I thought you could . . . and proven to be one by her own tweet!  I daresay her opponent(s) are printing poster-size copies of that photograph right now, and rubbing their hands in glee at the drubbing they’re about to give

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Doofus Of The Day #1,048

Today’s award goes to some red-faced Green protesters in England.  A tip o’ the hat to reader Snoggeramus for the link. Bungling climate change activists chanted slogans and banged drums outside a London office block today, only to discover the energy company they thought was based there has long moved on. Protesters from a group called ‘Reclaim the Power’ picketed what they thought was the office of gas plant firm Drax in London’s Moorgate this morning, closing the usually busy road for hours and causing fury among local workers. But their chants aimed at upsetting Drax’s bosses were in vain after

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Doofus Of The Day #1,047

Today’s award goes to an Australian stoner. An allegedly stoned and unlicensed Melbourne teenager, accused of ramming a police car and breaking an officer’s leg, has been granted bail. Benjamin Saurini, 19, previously said he couldn’t see the police vehicle because his car windows had fogged up from smoking cannabis after a session with friends on Friday night. Saurini allegedly took off when he thought he was going to be “jumped” by officers on patrol, but panicked and side-swiped their car. He is accused of pinning a senior constable against the car, breaking his leg. Saurini allegedly read a news article

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Doofus Of The Day #1,046

Today’s award goes to the Patrouille Suisse, the aerobatic display team of the Swiss Air Force, for this mistake. A rather unusual as well as bit embarrassing “incident” occurred to the the Swiss Air Force’s “Patrouille Suisse” Display Team on Saturday Jul. 6, 2019: the team’s jets were scheduled to fly over Langenbruck, in northwestern Switzerland, south of Basel, where the commemoration of the 100th anniversary of the death of Swiss aviation pioneer Oskar Bider was held, but they flew over Mümliswil, missing the target by about 6 km (about 3¾ miles). “Unfortunate circumstances” were the root cause of the mistake according to a spokesman of

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Doofus Of The Day #1,045

Today’s award goes to anyone who spends money on this. Have you ever heard of cow cuddling? It’s the hottest trend at the moment, and experts say it’s a beneficial wellness method. . . . Mountain Horse Farm in upstate New York invites visitors to try the “Horse & Cow Experience.” Individuals are given a chance to spend some time with large animals, and they can also pet or brush animals. If you don’t like to play with cows, you can just cuddle with them. The body temperature of cows is higher than ours and have a lower heart rate. Cuddling

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Doofus Of The Day #1,044

Today’s award goes to the Crown Prosecution Service in England. A multi-million-pound diamond scam case collapsed after it emerged that the prosecution’s star witness was a fantasist with no qualifications. Between May 2011 and February 2015, more than 70 victims – mainly vulnerable pensioners – were conned into investing into one of five companies which invested in the diamond and carbon credit industries. In total, they lost £3.5million [about US $4.4 million] and today at Southwark Crown Court eight defendants walked free from court after a judge was forced to deliver not guilty verdicts on multiple fraud charges. The case collapsed following “chaotic”

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Doofus Of The Day #1,043

Today’s award goes to a British trainee restaurant manager. The unidentified group … walked into the Hawksmoor’s bar on a busy Tuesday night whilst the restaurant had its hands full with 170 other diners. “It was an usually very busy night for us,” restaurant manager Dale Clovey said. “The Biba conference is currently taking place in Manchester at the moment, so we think they came from that. They were suited businessmen.” Alongside a 350g ribeye steak, two 300g fillet steaks and a side of mash potatoes, they asked the waitresses for a 2001 bottle of Chateau Pichon Longueville Contesse de Lalande,

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Doofus Of The Day #1,041

Today’s award goes to a self-described “doctor” in Kuwait. Kuwaiti new-age therapist Dr. Mariam Al-Sohel said in a March 25, 2019 interview on Scope TV (Kuwait) that she has developed an anal suppository based on the “Prophetic medicine” of the Prophet Muhammad.  Dr. Sohel claims that the new suppository cures homosexuality by exterminating the “anal worm that feeds on semen.” Showing examples of the suppositories, she claimed that this treatment has been subjected to modern research and testing. She referred to homosexual men as “the third gender” and to “butch lesbians” as the “fourth gender” and said that the new

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Well Seasoned Fool said…

Today’s winner is from Modesto, California. Authorities say a man has suffered third-degree burns over half of his body while trying to melt a plastic jug full of gasoline in a Northern California parking lot … [he] was using a lighter to melt the mouth of a gallon water jug into the shape of funnel to make it easier to pour the fuel into his car. Instead, the jug exploded in flames. The man and a nearby car also caught fire. . . . He was airlifted to a hospital. There’s more at the link. Sounds like a Darwin Award looking for a home,

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